In Bed With Alexa: Have Better Sex

3d ago

Sexologist Alexa Andre ( @sexwithalexa ) gets in bed with tantric practitioner, pleasure educator, and soon-to-be author Davia Frost for a deep conversation about decentering penetration and expanding what sex can be. Recorded on the Temptation Cruise, this episode explores how slowing down, breathing, presence, and creativity can lead to more satisfying, intimate, and embodied pleasure without sex needing to revolve around penetration. We discuss: What it means to decenter penetration and why penetration is overemphasized in mainstream culture How expanding your definition of sex increases pleasure, intimacy, and satisfaction Why heterosexual couples tend to rush to intercourse and how this limits pleasure Using the full body as an instrument of pleasure rather than focusing only on genitals Slowing down, softening the body, and learning how to receive pleasure Myths around sex, obligation, and the idea that penetration is required Making penetration optional without sex feeling “incomplete” Erogenous zones beyond genitals (neck, ears, inner thighs, behind the knees, clavicle, elbows, nipples) Nipple play and nipple orgasms Different types of orgasms and expanding orgasmic capacity Breathwork, sound, humming, and tantra as tools for pleasure Why holding your breath can limit orgasmic potential Presence vs performance in sex Oral sex as intimacy, honoring, and shared pleasure rather than a chore Eye gazing, kissing, dirty talk, and touch as deeply intimate acts Ego, vulnerability, and why sex often ends when penetration ends Ending sex based on satisfaction, not orgasms or penetration Communication strategies for talking about pleasure without hurting egos Sexual menus, check-ins, and having conversations outside the bedroom Scheduling intimacy, playfulness, and creative erotic invitations What straight couples can learn from queer sex culture Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Use code ALEXA to try their platform for free for 24h and, if you love it, get 50% off their yearly pass. 14 day money back guarantee if you don't! Click here to sign up: https://beducate.me/pd2548-alexa 🔥 Want more? Join my ⁠ Patreon ⁠ for unedited episodes , behind-the-scenes tea on my personal dating & sex life, and access to my Close Friends on Instagram!

Dec 11

Sexologist Alexa Andre ( @sexwithalexa ) gets back in bed with sex & relationship coach Catherine Drysdale for the most honest, nuanced conversation about voluntary celibacy you’ve ever heard. Together they break down how intentionally stepping away from partnered sex can reset your dating patterns, raise your standards, calm your nervous system, help you stop centering dating/sex, reconnect you to your body, and ultimately make your sex life better. In this episode, Catherine opens up about: What voluntary celibacy actually means Why she’s chosen celibacy multiple times Libido dips during high-stress seasons– Prioritizing outercourse for better sex Celibacy as a tool for breaking validation cycles How to stop centering dating, sex and external validation Dating while celibate & setting clear boundaries How long a celibacy period should last How to decide when to re-enter sex or dating into your life What she learned about sexual compatibility The “reset effect” on desire and self-esteem How celibacy helped her see red flags sooner Why a sex break often leads to better sex How to be more intentional once you start having sex again Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Use code ALEXA to try their platform for free for 24h and, if you love it, get 50% off their yearly pass. 14 day money back guarantee if you don't! Click here to sign up: https://beducate.me/pd2548-alexa 🔥 Want more? Join my ⁠ Patreon ⁠ for unedited episodes , behind-the-scenes tea on my personal dating & sex life, and access to my Close Friends on Instagram!

Nov 27

Sexologist Alexa Andre ( @sexwithalexa ) gets in bed with sex educator, pleasure expert, and the Handjob Queen herself, Ashley Manta ( @cannasexual ), for the most comprehensive handjob episode ever recorded, all from the middle of the Ionian Sea aboard a Desire Cruise. Together, they dive into Ashley’s entire sexual evolution, her journey into sex education, her non-monogamous love story, and her insanely detailed handjob techniques that go way beyond the basics. This episode is part sex education masterclass, part storytelling, part technique demonstration and entirely iconic. We cover: How Ashley de-centered penetration in her relationships and learned to prioritize warm-up, touch, and manual stimulation Why she prefers clitoral stimulation with fingers over any vibrator / oral Squirting vs orgasm: why they’re different experiences and how Ashley experiences both Handjobs in cars, the “blowjobs for rides” era, and giving a handjob in a DHL truck Working at a sex shop and learning techniques from experts like Reid Mihalko, Ducky Doolittle, Tristan Taormino, and more Her decade of learning technique through sex parties, workshops, and hands-on practice The “toxic tantra boyfriend” who was incredible at sex but emotionally manipulative How handjobs became Ashley’s specialty and why she teaches them professionally Using partners as “live demos” during workshops Her handjob philosophy: connection, breathwork, presence, pressure, rhythm, and affirmation How to handle soft cocks, why softness is normal, and how to help someone relax into arousal Why lube is non-negotiable , why Ashley prefers silicone lube, and her love for the baby bottle warmer hack Circumcised vs uncircumcised penis techniques and what adjustments matter Full techniques breakdown Why Ashley doesn’t enjoy giving blowjobs (TMJ + dislike of cum), and how she clearly makes up for it Outsourcing BJ duties during group play thanks to her and Nick’s non-monogamous dynamic Anal play safety and boundaries: how Nick discovered he loves anal, how they explored it safely, and hygiene must-knows Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Use code ALEXA69 to try their platform for free for 24h and, if you love it, get 65% off their yearly pass. 14 day money back guarantee if you don't! Click here to sign up: https://beducate.me/pd2544-alexa

Nov 13

Sexologist Alexa Andre ( @sexwithalexa ) sits down with Ian Kerner , sex therapist and author of the groundbreaking bestseller She Comes First, He Comes Next, and So Tell Me About the Last Time You Had Sex. They talk about why his 2004 classic is still changing bedrooms two decades later, how the clitoris remains misunderstood, and what makes sex truly great. We discuss: - Why She Comes First is still a global bestseller 21 years later - ⁠The science of the clitoris and its internal structures - Why all orgasms are clitoral — and what “outercourse” really means - Why penetration-only sex leads to bad sex and performance anxiety - The most common sexual problems heterosexual couples face today - How to shift from intercourse-focused sex to pleasure-focused sex - Why rhythm and persistence are essential for clitoral stimulation - Why novelty helps early on but routine deepens connection - How rushing and orgasm-chasing have ruined slow sex - The differences between male and female arousal cycles - ⁠The three assurances every giver should offer during oral sex - Why enthusiasm is the sexiest thing a partner can show - How women’s insecurities (“I’m taking too long,” “Do I smell?”) block pleasure - Why giving oral sex might be the key to your erection problems An unfiltered, intimate conversation about why She Comes First is still essential reading and how better sex starts with slowing down, getting curious, and caring more. Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Use code ALEXA69 to try their platform for free for 24h and, if you love it, get 65% off their yearly pass. 14 day money back guarantee if you don't! Click here to sign up: https://beducate.me/pd2544-alexa

Nov 6

Sexologist Alexa Andre ( @sexwithalexa ) sits down with Amanda Dames , the kink consultant and sex & relationship coach, for a deep dive into the world of kink — from power dynamics and negotiation to choking, bondage, chastity, and aftercare. Amanda, a former dominatrix and current coach for couples and individuals, breaks down how to safely explore desire, communicate boundaries, and find confidence in both dominance and submission. We discuss: What a kink consultant actually does and how Amanda works with couples and individuals How to talk about kink and start negotiating scenes with a partner The concept of core desires : what drives your kinks on a deeper level Power exchange and why it’s one of the most common and misunderstood kinks How to safely practice choking and the difference between sides and trachea pressure How to create and close a scene, use safe words, and practice aftercare The difference between a kink and a fetish (and why fantasizing isn’t cheating) What to do when one partner is kinky and the other isn’t The importance of curiosity, consent, and mutual care in exploring desires Why choking porn shouldn’t be banned, it should be taught safely How to avoid nerve damage in bondage and the importance of safety scissors How to transition between dominance and submission when you’re a switch Why chastity for men is on the rise and what makes it exciting The realities of power play, punishment, and control What good aftercare looks like: from cuddling to next-day check-ins Why communication before, during, and after sex prevents harm and deepens connection The role of negotiation, consent, and enthusiasm in every scene Why more women should take control in bed and why more men should learn to be submissive How lingerie, pegging, and roleplay are more common (and fun) than people think Amanda’s fetish for being punished and how fantasy enhances orgasm

Oct 30

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@ ⁠ sexwithalexa ⁠ ) ⁠ sits on the couch with Robyn Silber ⁠ — a former Google software engineer who slept with 70 men in 10 months and then realized she’s asexual. Robyn opens up about her “slut era,” sexual health, discovering demisexuality, navigating autism and dating, and why she’s now working to help lonely men build real connection. We talk about: Dating younger men and having 70 sexual partners in her first 10 months in NYC Sexual health: chlamydia, BV, yeast infections, UTIs, and learning to advocate for herself Why only ~5 of 70 partners made her orgasm and how she wasn’t asking for pleasure The difference between physical attraction and real sexual desire How asexuality doesn’t mean low libido or lack of masturbation Her current relationship: emotional connection, sensuality, and slow intimacy Why everyone should have a “slut era” and what to keep in mind Her idea to launch an online support group for men who aren’t getting laid The male loneliness crisis and how empathy can rebuild connection Why men should focus on friendship, hobbies, and social skills before dating

Oct 23

Sexologist Alexa Andre ( @sexwithalexa ) gets in bed with Haley Jakobson , author of Old Enough , bisexual Dream Girl , and OCD Princess , to talk about friendship, therapy, OCD, and sex. Haley opens up about how her OCD has shaped her relationships, sexuality, creative life and how vulnerability and repair have transformed her friendships and intimacy. We discuss: The importance of friendship and why it can be even more transformative than romantic love Learning to fight and repair conflict with friends instead of avoiding it Friendship breakups, grief, and when to let go vs. when to repair How attachment styles (anxious vs. avoidant) affect friendships and conflict The parallels between romantic and platonic relationship skills Navigating OCD, intrusive thoughts, and relationship anxiety Sexual shame, low libido, and reconnecting with desire during recovery The impact of COVID on libido, self-pleasure, and intimacy How OCD and anxiety affect sexual intimacy and self-image Learning to find satisfaction without pressure to perform sexually Haley’s upcoming novel Cave Girl and the story behind its title Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Use code ALEXA to try their platform for free for 24h and, if you love it, get 50% off their yearly pass. 14 day money back guarantee if you don't! Click here to sign up: https://beducate.me/pd2540-alexa

Oct 9

Sexologist Alexa Andre ( @sexwithalexa ) gets in bed with Nina Divina , Mama Muse and founder of Haus of Muse , for a powerful and playful conversation about confidence, burlesque, sensuality, and how to be the main character in your sex life. We talk about: What “cunt is an energy” really means and how to embody it Overcoming body image struggles and learning to love your reflection How to be the main character in your sex life and in everyday life The power of adopting a persona to boost confidence Why teasing is the most underrated form of foreplay Teasing vs. flirting — and how anticipation makes everything hotter Building sexual confidence through self-love and self-touch Reconnecting with your sensuality after losing it The importance of breathing, eye contact, and connection before sex How “fake it till you make it” and “delulu is the solulu” actually work Stretching, sensual movement, and small daily rituals to feel sexy again Why confidence, play, and teasing make sex better for everyone 🔥 Want more? Join my ⁠ Patreon ⁠ for unedited episodes , behind-the-scenes tea on my personal dating & sex life, and access to my Close Friends on Instagram! Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Use code ALEXA to try their platform for free for 24h and, if you love it, get 50% off their yearly pass. 14 day money back guarantee if you don't! Click here to sign up: https://beducate.me/pd2540-alexa