AuDHD Flourishing

Brendan Mahan's concept of The Wall of Awful has taken on a life of its own. While originally geared toward ADHD, it's also extremely applicable to other neurodivergent folks including autism, AuDHD, OCD, and PDA.In short, there are a bunch of tough emotions built up over time between you and tasks that are difficult for you (whether or not anyone else believes they are easy). While you may instinctively figure out how to sidestep or smash through the issues, it's not really addressing the deeper problem that still affects you the next time.Brendan's book, The Wall of Awful, comes out Sep 1 2026, and you can learn an overview of the concepts at the YouTube videos listed under #3 belowConnect with Brendan / Mentioned in episode:The Wall of Awful book & resources, and if you're buying on Amazon here's my affiliate linkFriendship Skills for Neurodivergent Adults by Caroline Maguire, book, affiliate link2 short vids explaining the Wall of Awful & strategies for going through & over it by Jessica McCabe of How to ADHDAuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

"Consistency" can feel like a dirty word in neurodivergent land... Consistency is a tool, not a final answer. It can be a better fit than habits for our brains (see past 3 episodes) It can be part of building systems that work for us (including reminders, since forgetting is a big reason for inconsistency) Kindness and self-compassion are where consistency REALLY matters, because they build capacity over time AuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Builds on last two episodes: Self-Awareness vs. Solutions and Habits are Hard (but also very cool)Breaking "bad" habits is different (and more difficult) than building new habits. I also recommend not being too aggressive about it if those coping mechanisms are load bearing psychologically ;)AuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

There's some evidence that ADHD brains in particular may have trouble forming habits as they're traditionally thought of. But that doesn't mean they have no value for us!This episode is about how to lean into the part of habit formation that may work for us (spoiler alert, you may need WEIRD rewards)Builds on last week's episode, Self-Awareness vs. Solutionsp.s. hopefully the birdsong in the background isn't too annoying... I recorded with the windows open and didn't realize it would pick up! p.p.s. by the time you listen to this, we'll be at 1,000,000 downloads 🥳AuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

You may have been told that you're "so self-aware," yet struggle to actually implement solutions. In the moment, you might be lacking the support, the executive function, the initiation energy, etc.Introspection and self-awareness are great, but they're not the end of the process.AuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In the context of learning a musical instrument, it's obvious that there's a period of not being good at it. Whether you call it mediocrity or a skill gap, there's often a gap between where you are and where you want to be. There are many cases in which we can only improve by doing, trying, and yes, failing. It's uncomfortable and that's normal. You don't have to like it, but it is a step in learning or improving.I HATE IT. And I also know it's going to happen.AuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Trying to do all of the things, all of the time is a recipe for being stuck.Instead, do some of the things, some of the time.The episode also talks about a couple of imagination techniques that may help with some types of PDA or other demand avoidance.AuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Last week we talked about creative entrepreneurship.This episode is about my recent & current creative blocks and insecurities that cover some of the difficulties of being a professional creative.And because people may ask: here's my pre-transition voice, and more-or-less current voiceRelated episodes: 100 Creative Time Limitations24 Redefining Creative Success with Chris HaleAuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Jon Hart is building an online space for neurodivergent musicians. And our conversation focused on the entrepreneurship side of things, because occasionally our disability disables us!Being a creative entrepreneur has its own challenges. One of which is having too many ideas... Connect with Jon: neurodivergentmusicians.com & the research questionnairejonhartmusic.comAuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Predictive Processing (or coding) differences are a relatively new proposed idea about an underlying mechanism of autism. Preliminary studies do show differences, but not necessarily "deficits," which I think is promising.While it may not explain everything, it's a compelling theory that resonates in my anecdotal experience.More reading/listening on predictive processing:The predictive coding theory of autism, explained (article w audio option)Predictive processing as a mechanistic account of Autism (video talk sent to me & I haven't listened yet)Understanding Autism through Predictive Processing (blog post)How the "Predictive Processing Framework" is Impacting Your Relationship (audio talk by Sarah Bergenfield)2025 paper on predictive processing, available for free as of nowAuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I just had a shocking experience regarding my own energy levels while on vacation. Truly, I never would have predicted it even if you laid out all of the details going in.This episode is about figuring out what drains and rejuvenates your energy, so you can start to choose where that (technically limited) bucket of energy goes.AuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The story of a meltdown. For me these days, that includes some intrusive thoughts around being a burden.You are not a burden. And even if we are sometimes, that's okay. I want to be a part of communities that can carry each other sometimes.repost of ep 23Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail Newsletter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week I pushed my body way too far, even though I was having trouble parsing that in the moment. The story is also a great analogy for how other ND internal needs feel (including PDA).Even with all the info, self-kindness, and support, I still struggle to find that exact line of capacity. It's okay that it's hard to figure out!This is the perfect and slightly ironic follow-up from last week's episode about giving up on NT/ableist expectations ;) (ep 80)Repost of ep. 81Mentioned in episode: wish listExperimenting Your Way to an Extraordinary LifeComparative Grammar of Spanish, Portuguese, Italian and French (affiliate link)Mackareth's Neurocomplexity model (& affiliate link if you want to sign up)Resources:Transcript DocEmail NewsletterLike Your Brain community space Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Alexithymia is common in AuDHDers, and involves having trouble identifying and communicating emotions. There are a lot of reasons this can be the case, including: interoception differenceslack of useful training in emotional skills & languagedifferent emotional experiences than expected in the situationChildhood Emotional Neglect (which can cause alexithymia) Alexithymia is NOT a disorder! It's a difference. And... you may have reasons to question whether there are aspects of it you want to address.Additional reading: When you can read everyone but yourself: on autistic and ADHD emotional awareness by Morgana ClementineWhat Is Alexithymia? Defined, Explained, and Linked to Neurodivergence from Neurodivergent InsightsAlexithymia on Stimpunks (various quotations gathered)AuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I would guess that most AuDHDers struggle with money in one way or another. Saving or planning for the future can be particularly difficult to emotionally attach to in the same way we connect with wanting something in the present moment. I use several tools to stay emotionally connected to my money big picture, and spoiler alert none of them is a budget: tracking all income closely a multi-tab finances overview spreadsheet that includes monthly income over time + a debt tab with all monthly paymentscalculating Net Worth* monthly (using a spreadsheet I found online) While a strict budget has never worked for me, staying attached to my overall money picture has been incredibly helpful. The latter part of the episode shares two tools for anxiety around money: @12:14 - Reversing the spin (works for any spinning sensation, and any type of anxiety) @20:23 - "Throwing" the task to the horizon, then bringing it back in safe ways. Repeat until feeling more neutralp.s. doing #2 above while recording actually helped me get started on my taxes, which I submitted six days early (possibly a personal record??) *yes this is a terrible termAuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Thanks again to Hyperfocus with Rae Jacobson for sharing this interview with financial therapist Christine Hargrove. She shares ADHD-focused advice that is useful for AuDHD folks as well! And the next two weeks will touch on other financial topics from this foundation.I especially love the line, "The best budget is one you can follow on your worst day" Learn more about Hyperfocus with Rae Jacobson here! AuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I just started using a paper planner again for the first time in many years, and the coolest thing is noticing that calendared blocks of time feel more "real" to my brain when I've written them by hand. That tangibility in turn seems to be making it easier to stick with things. Caveat that it can always be the initial dopamine surge of any new system! That said, if it's working, I say try new tools anyway, even if they only work for a few months ;)AuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Sometimes... a process is happening, internally. It can be integration, change, growth, positive disintegration... and sometimes it's unclear. Either way, the uncertainty can be disconcerting and frustrating!AuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

With an interest-based nervous system + AuDHD cyclical energy, the hardest tasks for us areBoringAnnoyingHigh Stakes and/orDifficultThe episode covers how and why they're difficult, and some starting points for each one.The steps from later in the episode:If you're struggling to start something, identify if it's Boring, Annoying, High Stakes, or Difficult.Give yourself compassion for why that makes this task hard to do right now, and tell yourself that you don't actually have to do it right now (this eases up some demand avoidance potentially)If your mind-body system offers a suggestion or solution, feel free to go for it! Otherwise, it's okay to set this aside for now and let your unconscious mind chew it over.If this is a time-sensitive or urgent task, do what you need to do to remind yourself to check back in in time: a timer, a calendar reminder, a prominent post it note etc.Now let your unconscious and your weird and creative brain work on this in the background while you rest or work on something easier. I love keeping a list of actually easy tasks for this purpose (which for me means the thing is straightforward and physically easy to do with a clear done point).Brilliant addition from NallieSmsh's review: "One that may fall under high stakes that I thought may deserve its own category are tasks that are gross... sensory, sanitation, care task, which could be annoying, difficult and/or potentially high stakes”AuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

If you're feeling angry lately, that makes a lot of sense! It's not a bad emotion. In fact, it can feel quite motivating to create change. But what if you are feeling isolated and/or don't have capacity to directly create that change right now? That's where nourishing and care work come in, even if they're only for you (for now).While I don't use the word self-care in the episode, that's in part the kind of nourishing I mean. Once your capacity is higher, you'll be able to build more. And the people doing the literal feeding and care work are just as much a part of the movement! AuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Sometimes I mix up true desires with interests and hyperfocus. But what about the persistent and even lifelong interests? Where do they fit in?This episode is for anyone who wants to throw their life out the window and start over when in the throes of a new interest ;) You're not broken!AuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This goes along with the interview about Embodied Exercise. For many people, the other side of that coin is eating. And rates of disordered eating are higher among Autistics, ADHDers (especially women), and trans and gender non-conforming folks.The episode only briefly touches on ARFID, an eating disorder more likely to affect autistic people for multiple reasons. If you know someone who could be an expert interview on ARFID, please send them my way.Oh another fun fact I didn't mention... it's possible that the "obesity epidemic" (unscientific nonsense) was literally caused by dieting. Yes, that's correlation, but damn it makes a compelling chart. (from Anti-Diet, book below)Mentioned in episode:Book Anti-Diet: Reclaim Your Time, Money, Well-Being, and Happiness Through Intuitive Eating by Christy Harrison MPH RD*ep. 129 Embodied Exercise with Martha MunroeAuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord)*affiliate link Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Most people have one or two core self-care needs that, if they're met, everything else feels easier. This episode is about how to figure out yours... and what to look out for when you hear people preaching about their own!There's also acknowledgment that your neurodivergent body and brain may process things in different ways, so the following questions may not be that useful for you.Figuring out your core self-care need or needs (just a jumping-off point!): Thinking back to times in your life when things felt the easiest, what was your life like? Which of your needs were being met fairly well?When life has been a bit easier or better, did you notice any particular ups and downs based on particular needs being met? For example, if you were overall feeling pretty good compared to your baseline, was there anything that particularly threw you off? Or something that could bring you back to that feeling better pretty quickly?Tuning into your body right now, is there anything your body is asking for? This won't necessarily be a core need, it's more a check-in to see what messages your body is already good at giving you.Thinking about the past few days, weeks, or months, are there any messages your body has been consistently giving you? For example, when you've felt tired, does it feel more like you need sleep, or more like you need food, or more like you need to be around another person to recharge? Again, this isn't a perfect metric, just noticing how your body talks to you.Is there any form of self-care that feels like it REALLY fixes a bad day?Resources mentioned: Takedown of Why We Sleep: https://guzey.com/books/why-we-sleep/Commentary on the above post: https://statmodeling.stat.columbia.edu/2019/11/18/is-matthew-walkers-why-we-sleep-riddled-with-scientific-and-factual-errors/Transcript DocAnd one more link someone sent taking down the book Why We Sleep (I haven’t listened to this episode but the links alone look great): https://open.spotify.com/episode/4r0Vawq8xAfnsnKbYVUNhc?si=n7t-koeuS2GXQ2QnA8j4dQAuDHD Flourishing resources:<a href="https://docs.google.com/document/d/1af--Bdjiwe_3nSMNnvgBRRsj5WT8DmJ_SX0VzPd9_PU/edit?usp=sharing" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="

it is what it isAuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Martha Munroe, a neurodivergent personal trainer, was noticing patterns in the ways her clients talked about exercise and their bodies. They were often driven by external goals (aesthetics, performance, what others think) vs. the internal experience of movement.She reframes exercise as a way to explore and express through embodiment. Also, reclaiming exercise (not only movement) by offering gentle structure if desired.I loved her book, Attuned Exercise!Connect with Martha: Attuned Exercise websiteMartha's Instagram, @attunedexercisemarthamunroe.comAlso mentioned in episode (book I'm reading): Girl on Girl: How Pop Culture Turned a Generation of Women Against ThemselvesAuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord)book links are affiliate links Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Parenting as an AuDHDer is challenging and misunderstood. Many parents I speak to are near or in burnout at any given time, especially if they had kids before discovering their neurotype (which is common). This episode is based not on my experience as a parent, but my experience having spoken and heard from many AuDHD parents, and what I see working for them.This is in part a follow up to last week's interview with Julie M GreenMentioned in episode:Book Good Inside by Dr Becky Kennedy* (and her Instagram)AuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord)*affiliate link Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Julie M. Green is the author of Motherness: A Memoir of Generational Autism, Parenthood, and Radical Acceptance. She shares about how difficult early parenthood was, how different her autism presents versus her kid's, and navigating school and regulation skills.The book is a vulnerable look at some of the challenging and lighthearted moments of raising an autistic kid.Connect with Julie:Her book Motherness: A Memoir of Generational Autism, Parenthood, and Radical Acceptance Website: juliemgreen.caInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/juliem.greenSubstack: https://theautisticmom.substack.com/AuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord)*affiliate link Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

You deserve to survive this. Please stay.And if staying out of spite helps you, it has gotten me through some tough times.My Medium article, "Please Stay, We Need You"Repost of ep. 75Crisis Resources:USA-based anonymous crisis chatInternational crisis linesVarious types of crisis resources in about 10 countriesResources:Transcript DocEmail NewsletterLike Your Brain community space Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Flow is pleasant and often productive. It may also require some guardrails to be healthy for AuDHDers, especially those of us on the very monotropic side. It's often easy for us to get into flow and hyperfocus, and to stay in them until they stop feeling pleasant.Adding in more rest and recovery, including preparatory rest as needed, can really help!It's also okay to avoid flow states for a period of time, as I am right now for the most part.Do Less program for 2026 (starts Jan 15, reach out by Jan 7)Email [email protected] with application answers, and/or any questionsAuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Max Alexander is an artist and play worker who has mapped some common shapes of autistic play. He's passionate about neuro-affirming play for all ages.Play is both a healing tool, and can help prevent some of the effects of trauma (we touch on this lightly, a concept I learned from Linda Thai) One possible way to apply the play styles is noticing which ones speak to you, and which ones you're already engaging in, then leaning into those.The ebook is free, and it's a quick and excellent read!Apologies for the audio quality. Max was using a headset and didn't have an actual microphone, so I did the best I could to clean it upDo Less program for 2026 (starts Jan 15, reach out by Jan 7)Email [email protected] with application answers, and/or any questionsConnect with Max:Max's book, The Joys and Shapes of Autistic PlayMax's Substack, Play RadicalAuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

AuDHD leadership touches on last week's interview with Dr Megan Anna Neff. And it goes beyond the visible leadership of creating content, or being in the public eye.AuDHD leadership can includebeing your authentic selfvisibly meeting your sensory needssharing what helps you (whether or not it's advice)Mentioned in episode:- Do Less program for 2026 (starts Jan 15, reach out by Jan 7)Email [email protected] with application answers, and/or any questions- Blog post with business episodesAuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Dr Megan Anna Neff is a neurodivergent therapist and thought leader, who became popular in 2022 with their "Misdiagnosis Monday" series. Their thoughtful content has helped many thousands of AuDHDers and other neurodivergent folks feel seen and understood.Today we talk abouthaving a small business as a neurodivergent person (including PDA at the end)the questions and concerns we have about creating helpful content, and not causing harmhow weird it is to be perceivedConnect with Megan Anna & Neurodivergent Insights:Free Help Me Stay Plan (for SI)Website: neurodivergentinsights.comDivergent Conversations Podcast: www.divergentpod.comInstagram: www.instagram.com/neurodivergent_insights/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@NeurodivergentInsightsTVDo Less program for 2026 (starts Jan 15)AuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Doing less of what's harming you opens up time and energy. You can enjoy that as rest, and if desired, eventually fill it in with what you do want.AuDHDers often need to move at a slower pace, in many ways. Sometimes we then have creative bursts that move fast... but the space comes FIRST!Mentioned in episode:Do Less program for 2026 (starts Jan 15)book, Anti-Diet by Christy Harrison (affiliate link)AuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Pasha joins again to talk about what they've learned in the past two years since last being on the show! We talk about belonging, triggers in relationships, and much more.She also shares the ableism behind the scenes of an autism training from a large (unnamed) org.Mentioned in episode:Pasha's website & LinkedInInstagram @neuroqueercoachTikTok @neuroqueercoachPasha's YouTubeAuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Decluttering, organizing, and cleaning my home in a more routine way is having some interesting effects on my perfectionist tendencies! (Plus, perfectionism comes up in the decision-making process; more on that in my interview on A Slob Comes Clean, which I'll link here when it's out.)Specifically, a cleaner space = less decision fatigue = lower cognitive load = more executive function resources for ME!If you want support with that:Decluttering Days free 5-day event (Nov 17-21 2025)Mentioned in episode (Dana K White resources):Free 5-Step Decluttering Process (note it's /five, not /5 at aslobcomesclean.com)A Slob Comes Clean podcast & YouTube channelOrganizing for the Rest of UsDecluttering at the Speed of LifeHow to Manage Your Home Without Losing Your Mind (book links are affiliate links)AuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Dana K White, like me, couldn't find advice that worked for her. So she made it up! And it turns out, it was helpful for many other people too.After writing an anonymous blog about cleaning her overwhelmingly cluttered home, Dana "came out" and started helping others too. Also, many of those people let her know she seems to have ADHD ;)Her explanations have already helped me a lot, and given me hope about a clean home for the first time in ages.We talk about many of the overarching themes/tips in her books (which are linked below)Decluttering Days free 5-day event (Nov 17-21 2025)Connect/Learn more from Dana:Free 5-Step Decluttering Process (note it's /five, not /5 at aslobcomesclean.com)A Slob Comes Clean podcast & YouTube channelOrganizing for the Rest of UsDecluttering at the Speed of LifeHow to Manage Your Home Without Losing Your Mind (book links are affiliate links)AuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Transitions are one of THE things that support the way that productivity shows up for AuDHDers! Transitions don't have to be all about work: play and rest can be transitions too. And sometimes we need transition time into and out of work, play, AND rest!Today I talk in more detail about how long transitions can take for me (routinely 30-60 minutes). If that's true for you, a 20-minute chunk of work (or getting interrupted) isn't going to feel that good compared to the transition time required. (That said, anything goes in burnout recovery!)Anecdotally: AuDHD folks may need more transition time than ADHD or Autistic folks (even though it's often talked about as an autism trait or need). If that's true, it's possible that it's monotropism that leads to higher transition time needs.Note: I misspoke when I said "dares and challenges." They're actually dares and commitments :)Decluttering Days free 5-day event (Nov 17-21 2025)AuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

PDA is the Persistent Drive for Autonomy (community term), or pathological demand avoidance (clinical & pathologizing term). What happens when PDA, ADHD, and autism all overlap? Well... stress and relationship challenges!Thankfully, everything that helped me feel more safe has also made my PDA more manageable. There are many approaches to build that safety.This episode is a follow-up to the interview on PDA last weekMentioned in episode: Book Low-Demand Parenting by Amanda Diekman (affiliate link)Last week's interview on PDA, and the podcast PDA: Resistance and ResilienceMattia's bday (or whenever) wish listAuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript Doc (often a few weeks behind, but we do catch up!)Mattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's been a running joke (that wasn't initially a joke) that I'm totally going to do a PDA episode very soon... since the very first episode of AuDHD Flourishing.Now we have one, thanks to Chris Wells and Marni Kammersell for interviewing me on PDA: Resistance and Resilience, and letting me cross-post the episode here!Mentioned in episode:Full show notesAuDHD Flourishing Episode 87: Giftedness ' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.co

About two years ago, I started ADHD stimulant medication as a regular (most days) thing. I've mentioned it here and there on the podcast. This is my most concentrated "review" of the main things I've noticed over the past two years. To be clear, when I mention a factor that might make stimulant meds more of a burnout risk, I'm not saying those folks shouldn't try it! Just to be very careful not to push through the body's capacity. Mentioned in episode: Mattia interviewed on Chris Wells' & Marni Kammersell's new podcast, PDA: Resistance and Resilience. Ep 7: Creative Resistance (I'll be posting this episode in the feed next week)AuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript DocMattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

One reason most advice doesn't work for us is that it's backwards. It's telling us to do/have the end result, rather than showing us how to get there.In the case of safety or shame, it's pretty clear that we can't just leap to the end of the process (if there even is one with a traumatized body).Mentioned in episode: Toxic Shame: What it is and How to Heal From it (YouTube, Heidi Priebe. Her take is overall better/more accessible than the book she's referencing, which is shockingly triggering all over the place)AuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript DocMattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

TQ (they/them) is a queer, trans, physically disabled, AuDHD Chinese-Singaporean artist, author/host of the upcoming book/podcast Queer! AuDHD! BIPOC!, and community facilitator for other queer neurodivergent BIPOC.In true ND fashion, we range over many topics, including the importance of community and hearing your own stories as a person with multiple intersecting identities. You can pre-order a copy of their upcoming book for behind-the-scenes/early access to the interviews and writing! TQ's links & mentioned in episode:Support the Queer! AuDHD! BIPOC! book and podcastAll the incredible neurodivergent, Autistic, and AuDHD creators of color TQ learns fromLovette Jallow on the history/use of the term "intersectionality" The Autastic CommunityAuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript DocMattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Also on YouTube for some visualsMy urge for minimalism is partly to provide myself with the visual cues I desperately need, without overwhelming myself with visual clutter. And, there has been a specifically classist push for minimalism that sometimes causes me to get rid of too much.Here's an excellent thread about minimalism, class, and why you're probably not a hoarderI especially loved the idea that you may just need better organization, because I really love lining things up. Now I'm focusing on organizing based on my interests, rather than what I think is the most practical or obvious!Mentioned in episode: Mastodon thread about minimalismThe exact iPad cover I showed that looks like a Composition notebook (still going strong almost four years in), affiliate linkAuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript DocMattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thanks to Hyperfocus with Rae Jacobson for letting me cross-post this important discussion about one of the first longitudinal studies of ADHD in women and girls!Full show notes, timestamps, and Transcript available on Hyperfocus' site(Ep 5, The “devastating” findings of a decades-long ADHD study, Dec 5, 2024 has the full version; it was reposted Aug 28 2025 with more brief notes)Show notes:Dr. Stephen Hinshaw is one of the leading voices when it comes to ADHD in women and girls. That’s in large part due to his work on The Berkeley Girls Study. (Its full name is The Berkeley Girls with ADHD Longitudinal Study, but most people know it by that shorthand or acronym: The BGALs Study.)Under Steve’s leadership, researchers began studying 140 girls with ADHD and a control group of nearly 90 girls without it. They’ve been following these girls into their adulthood, producing a reams of information that has helped shape current understanding of ADHD in women and girls. That said, Rae Jacobson had plenty of questions for Steve:Why did you want to study ADHD in girls at a time when it was typically seen as a boys’ disorder?Why is it that one type of ADHD seems to lead to such negative outcomes?What do we do about the stigma that still surrounds the disorder?note: This episode includes discussion of suicide and self-harm. Please take care when listening and skip this one if you need to.Listen to more episodes of Hyperfocus here Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Chronic shame makes us feel all kinds of terrible things that often are the triggers that send people to therapy.It's caused in part by relational rupture without repair, especially as an infant and child.While there's no quick fix, recognizing the signs and beginning to gently work with it does help over time.This is episode 10 of a series of 10 that started with 102 AuDHD Therapy That Works with Joe SostaI'm working on some more materials to pull all these episodes together in a useful way and will add that here when they're done! Crisis Resources:USA-based anonymous crisis chatInternational crisis linesVarious types of crisis resources in about 10 countriesMy Medium article, "Please Stay, We Need You"Mentioned in episode: Book Understanding and Treating Chronic Shame: Healing Right Brain Relational Trauma (I recommend this 2nd edition, affiliate link)Whack-a-Mole Workshop slides/notes and recordings (latter is free a downloadable PDF is also available there on Patreon)AuDHD Flourishing resources:Transcript DocMattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Darren Glencross was diagnosed near the beginning of 2025, and since then has written multiple books and come up with a new framework for people to explore outside of the medical model.It includes: Pattern Language, Inner Orbit with 12 satellites (and Their Orbit), and the Carry KitIt's exciting to explore community-led models!Connect with Darren: Darren's writings & Inner Orbit bookMessage on Instagram @beaconwithinDarren Glencross on LinkedInMentioned in episode:Love Your Brain course (& Sep-Oct live round details)Free workshops already concluded, and will be available most likely in the Patreon soon (I'll update this when they're somewhere!)You may also email questions about Love Your Brain to [email protected]:Transcript DocMattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

AuDHD brains face many challenges when it comes to projects. It's something I've put a great deal of time and learning into, both personally and professionally. This episode covers many ideas and approaches that tend to work for us.Key Takeaways:We usually learn to use what I call the Adrenaline-Anxiety Approach. While effective short-term, it can lead to burnout and other issues.A monotropic approach is more sustainable and individualized... and it can feel slow at first.Experimentation as a core toolCreating just enough structure and safety to get going, without getting bogged down (loose planning)Working with the brain states you haveManaging interruptions, inputs, and daily lifeFinding the balance that works for youThe episode also walks through the Love Your Brain course, designed to help AuDHDers understand their mind-body system, work with brain states, and navigate project challenges. The course emphasizes self-compassion, experimentation, and building processes tailored to individual needs.Repost - originally posted July 12th 2024Note: not strictly in the current 10-episode series, but still relevant!Links mentioned:Devon Price's Laziness Does Not Exist article, and a PDF if you're not on MediumThe transcript may be especially useful for this episode! (It'll take a few seconds for the link to fully load to this episode)Love Your Brain course (and the Sep/Oct 2025 live round info) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This ep also available on YouTube"use more lube:" do what you need to do to make life easier, more comfortable, and more pleasurable for you in the moment.This goes beyond sensory needs, though that's often where we start.You may not be sure what you want on the grand scale (or it feels impossible to get there). But being kind to yourself, and meeting your needs moment-to-moment, helps create a communication feedback loop with the body.Better communication and care for the body makes everything easier.ep. 8 in an interconnected 10-episode seriesMentioned in episode:Free Workshops registration linkLove Your Brain course (& Sep-Oct live round details)Resources:Transcript DocMattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Intuition has been a way to interface with my body, even when the relationship with my body was contentious.While I won't share the trauma stories that led to the subtitle (Intuition Saved My Life), I have a variety of examples of how unconscious information can surface in a useful way.ep. 7 in an interconnected 10-episode seriesMentioned in episode:Free Workshops registration linkLove Your Brain course (& Sep-Oct live round details)Resources:Transcript DocMattia's NewsletterLike Your Brain community space (Patreon/Discord) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.