About this episode
We often hear about the "fight - flight" response, that instinctive reaction to a fear-inducing situation. In fact, you've likely witnessed or responded to an actual or perceived threat with protective aggression or a fearful escape. Yet two other hardwired responses--freezing and fawning--are also part of our instinctual repertoire. And while such responses are intended to keep us safe and alive when in danger, they can actually hamper self-esteem, self-worth, and interpersonal relationships when they become our default. Today, we'll take a look at how an overactive fawn response--that tendency to appease and please--can make you lose your identity as you sacrifice yourself--your core identity--to make others happy and keep the peace. Join Dr. Carla Manly and renowned psychologist and trauma expert Dr. Ingrid Clayton for an empowering journey into healing from fawning--and reclaiming your voice and your life. Topics discussed include fawning, appeasing, fight-flight response, trauma, relational trauma, complex trauma, abuse, domestic violence, gaslighting, self-gaslighting, intergenerational trauma, intergenerational patterns, support groups, people-pleasing, self-compassion, healthy love, external validation, support groups, boundaries, healthy boundaries, flexible boundaries, healthy relationships, self-love, and self-growth. Please note that this episode contains sensitive material; listener discretion is advised. Emergency Assistance Note: If you or someone you know needs immediate support, please call your emergency services. In the US, 24/7 help is available by calling "911," "988" (Suicide and Crisis Hotline), or SAMSA (Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration) at 1-800-662-HELP (4357). Support/informational links are in the show notes. Books by Dr. Carla Manly: Joy from Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Joy-Fear-Carla-Marie-Manly/dp/1641701218 Date Smart: https://www.amazon.com/Date-Smart-Transform-Relationships-Fearlessly/dp/1641704675 Aging Joyfully: https://www.amazon.com/Aging-Joyfully-Optimal-Relationships-Fulfillment/dp/1641701412 The Joy of Imperfect Love: https://www.amazon.com/Joy-Imperfect-Love-Creating-Relationships/dp/1641709057 Oracle decks by Dr. Carla Manly: Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/listing/1757477615/imperfect-love-reflection-oracle-cards Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Imperfect-Love-Reflection-Oracle-Cards/dp/B0D1Z5M4YK Connect with Ingrid Clayton: https://www.ingridclayton.com/ https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/779579/fawning-by-dr-ingrid-clayton/ https://www.youtube.com/@IngridClaytonPhD https://www.facebook.com/IngridClaytonPhD https://www.tiktok.com/@ingridclaytonphd https://www.nami.org/support-education/nami-helpline/ https://odphp.health.gov/myhealthfinder/healthy-living/mental-health-and-relationships Love the show? Subscribe, rate, review, and share! https://drcarlamanly.com/