Meet My First Boyfriend and All the Ways I F**cked It Up | 57

Shownotes The story behind the quasi-cheating incident that ended the relationship Why Ryan and Layla's first kiss went horribly wrong How to take full responsibility for your actions and impact on others Why Ryan showed up at the Stanford campus in a full-on chicken costume How radical love is different than self-sacrificing What Ryan and Layla learned from opening their relationship Bio Ryan Cheney is a therapist, seeker, and guide devoted to the process of inner transformation. Based in Austin, TX, he works with individuals and couples to uncover what stands in the way of lasting change – and how to meet those blocks with presence, compassion, and courage. His work is deeply rooted in Internal Family Systems and a profound curiosity about how people evolve. Before turning his focus inward, Ryan was the founder of Raaka Chocolate, a Brooklyn-based bean-to-bar company built on transparency and ethical sourcing. But his truest calling lies in the inner landscapes: the quiet, tender spaces where real healing happens. His path has been shaped by deep inquiry, spiritual practice, and a love for the moments when people reconnect with the truth of who they are. Ryan believes transformation doesn't have to be a battle – it can be a remembering. He's most alive when exploring the alchemy of change, the courage it requires, and the unexpected grace that can come when we stop striving and start listening. Timestamps 00:01:16 - Guest introduction 00:06:02 - Ryan shares how he and Layla met 00:07:35 - Going from small and scared to big and free 00:07:59 - Where Layla was at in her life when she met Ryan 00:11:48 - Where Ryan was at in his life when he met Layla 00:12:31 - Sign up for Layla's newsletter at LaylaMartin.com 00:13:11 - Friendship turns into strong attraction 00:13:47 - Ryan describes he and Layla's first kiss 00:16:20 - Why the sex didn't initially work for Ryan 00:19:33 - Ryan learned to hold all parts of Layla 00:21:11 - Layla's first experience with somatic therapy 00:23:00 - Layla credits Ryan for being deeply present for her healing journey 00:24:33 - Unlock your deepest passion inside The Tantric Mastermind for Couples 00:26:00 - Layla's desire to find the real Tantra 00:27:19 - Ryan and Layla gave each other spiritual names 00:34:05 - Layla and Ryan discuss their experience with sexual healing 00:39:01 - Why we have to take full responsibility for our actions and impact on others 00:41:48 - How to be present with intensity and pain 00:41:57 - Discover MOOD™ Sex Magic 00:42:55 - Ryan and Layla drink MOOD SEX MAGIC 00:45:57 - The feedback Layla gave Ryan as their relationship ended 00:48:17 - Layla healed and opened her sexuality before healing and opening her heart 00:51:15 - Ryan shares what he learned from the end of the relationship 00:54:55 - Layla shares one of her favorite stories about Ryan 00:56:08 - How radical love is different than self-sacrificing 01:02:18 - Discover your most masculine confidence and presence with Men's Sexual Mastery 01:03:59 - Layla and Ryan share their experience with an open relationship 01:09:10 - Ryan shares what signaled the end for him 01:17:38 - What Layla learned from the end of the relationship 01:19:20 - What Ryan learned from the relationship 01:21:08 - One of the saddest parts of trauma 01:24:32 - Ryan's favorite parts of Layla from their relationship 01:27:41 - Conclusion