About this episode
Welcome to Episode 267 of Autism Parenting Secrets . If you’re a parent navigating autism—or know someone who is—this episode is an empowering reset. Dr. Stephen Cowan returns to the show with timeless wisdom and fresh insight on what truly matters. A developmental pediatrician who blends Eastern and Western medicine, Dr. Cowan shares how your presence profoundly shapes your child’s path—often in ways that go unseen. This isn’t just about your child’s attention. It’s about YOURS. Because where your attention goes, transformation begins. And the fastest way to support your child is to understand how they naturally focus and engage with the world. The secret this week is… ATTENTION Is the Beginning of DEVOTION You'll Discover: Why Interest = Attention, and Why That’s So Empowering for Parents (3:53) How Labels Create Suffering and Miss The Child’s Full Complexity (8:50) Why One-Size-Fits-All Medicine is Outdated and Dangerous (14:14) An Overview of the Five Arcetypes of Attention and What Each One Seeks (18:05) The “Wood” Child: Movers, Risk-takers, and Planners (20:45) The “Fire” Child: Joyful, Charismatic, and Easily Bored (24:27) The “Earth” Child: Relationship-focused and Harmony-driven (28:02) The “Metal” Child: Perfectionists Who Notice Every Detail (30:58) The “Water” Child: Deep Thinkers, Dreamers, and Visionaries (33:16) Why Presence Is The Ultimate Attention and How It Can Be Trained (37:21) When ADHD Meds Help—and When They Absolutely Don’t (44:12) How Turning a “Should” Into a “Would” Unlocks Compassion (51:34) About Our Guest: Stephen Cowan, MD, is a board-certified pediatrician with over 35 years of experience and a subspecialty in Developmental Pediatrics. A fellow of the American Academy of Pediatrics and a clinical assistant professor at NY Medical College, Dr. Cowan bridges Eastern and Western medicine. His holistic approach empowers parents and honors the unique ecology of every child. He’s the author of Fire Child, Water Child , and several children’s books, including The Lost Elephant . He lectures internationally and serves as a member of the American Academy of Medical Acupuncture. https://www.drstephencowan.com/ References In This Episode: Fire Child, Water Child: How Understanding the Five Types of ADHD Can Help You Improve Your Child’s Self-Esteem and Attention by Dr. Stephen Scott Cowan Princeton Study: Decomposition of phenotypic heterogeneity in autism reveals underlying genetic programs , Nature Genetics Autism Parenting Secrets Episode 14 with Dr. Stephen Cowan - Your Child is YOUR Teacher! Autism Parenting Secrets Episode 15 with Dr. Stephen Cowan - The "Cosmic Snowman" IS the Roadmap! Autism Parenting Secrets Episode 16 with Dr. Stephen Cowan - You Don’t Know YET Autism Parenting Secrets Episode 104 with Dr. Stephen Cowan - Harness Your Child’s True Nature Autism Parenting Secrets Episode 105 with Dr. Stephen Cowan - Go With The FLOW For Connection Mary Oliver Additional Resources: To learn more about personalized 1:1 support, go to www.elevatehowyounavigate.com Take The Quiz: What’s YOUR Top Autism Parenting Blindspot? If you enjoyed this episode, share it with your friends.