When Motherhood Unmasks Neurodiversity (ADHD and Autism)

More and more women are getting diagnosed with ADHD later in life, often after becoming parents, and it’s not because ADHD is “trending.” It’s because we’ve missed it for decades. In this conversation, I talk with psychiatrist and author Dr. Sasha Hamdani about why ADHD in girls and women often goes unnoticed, how hormones and motherhood reveal hidden symptoms, and why self-understanding can be so freeing. We discuss stigma, emotional regulation, anxiety, and how parenting can bring clarity to our own neurodiversity. If you’ve ever wondered why things got harder after kids, or why your child’s diagnosis suddenly made your own life make more sense, this episode will feel like a deep exhale. We discuss: Why ADHD in girls and women often gets overlooked How hormonal shifts during puberty, postpartum, and perimenopause can unmask ADHD The difference between anxiety-driven distraction and true ADHD How parenting adds new executive function challenges that make symptoms more visible The role of emotional regulation in ADHD—and why it’s missing from the diagnostic criteria How a late diagnosis can change the way you see yourself and parent your kids To connect with Dr. Sasha Hamdani follow her on Instagram @thepsychdoctormd and check out all her resources at https://www.drhamdanimd.com/. 00:00 - Intro 01:55 - Meet Dr. Sasha Hamdani: psychiatrist, ADHD specialist, and creator 04:00 - Rediscovering ADHD during medical school 06:00 - From burnout to advocacy: how social media changed her work 06:45 - Getting diagnosed as an adult woman and the emotions that followed 10:30 - How ADHD was misunderstood in the 90s—and still is for many girls 12:00 - Why diagnoses often appear after motherhood and hormonal shifts 16:30 - Parenting stress, executive function overload, and ADHD symptoms 18:20 - How girls are taught to mask and why that delays diagnosis 22:00 - ADHD, anxiety, and the “chicken or egg” challenge 27:00 - How self-understanding reshapes parenting and connection 35:15 - Why “superpower” isn’t the right framing—but awareness is powerful 41:20 - The missing piece: emotional regulation in ADHD and Sasha’s upcoming book 47:16 - Dr. Mona’s reflections on self-awareness, parenting, and compassion We’d like to know who is listening! Please fill out our Listener Survey to help us improve the show and learn about you! Our podcasts are also now on YouTube. If you prefer a video podcast with closed captioning, check us out there and ⁠subscribe to PedsDocTalk⁠ . Get trusted pediatric advice, relatable parenting insights, and evidence-based tips delivered straight to your inbox—join thousands of parents who rely on the PDT newsletter to stay informed, supported, and confident. ⁠⁠⁠⁠Join the newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠ ! And don’t forget to follow ⁠⁠⁠⁠@pedsdoctalkpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠ on Instagram—our new space just for parents looking for real talk and real support. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on the ⁠PedsDocTalk Podcast Sponsorships⁠ page of the website. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices