About this episode
We all deal with self-doubt. We question our abilities and ultimately our potential to make things happen. We say things like, ‘ I am not good enough! Did I make the right decision? What if I cannot handle this? ’ these are all examples of self-doubt. Most of the time, we have doubts about ourselves and our capabilities when we are lacking one of two things: confidence or competence. Past experience and comparing ourselves to others also leads to self-doubt. We also experience self-doubt when we do something new and challenging or something out of our comfort zone. But when it comes to something that we never did before having doubts is normal. To some extent, self-doubt is actually useful because it helps you see what skills you need to acquire or improve to perform a certain task better But if self-doubt becomes the norm it’s time for you to change that. Which brings me to a great quote… "When you doubt your power, you give power to your doubt"– Honore de Balzac. So, Let’s talk about Recognizing the signs of self-doubt. Being stuck with self-doubt can prevent you from living the life you desire. Self-doubt prevents you from starting the business you would love to, pursuing your passion, not applying for the amazing job promotion you think you deserve. You get the idea. So, self-doubt basically holds you back in life and ultimately from success. It leads to procrastination. It keeps you from taking action towards your goals and ultimately achieving them. When you have doubts you don’t seize the opportunities that might be present in your life. Self-doubt can have a negative effect on your life and confidence. So, how can you deal with self-doubt and move forward…The Key is in Identifying and overcome Self Doubt. Start by Recognizing the effects of self-doubt on your growth mindset: Excessive self-doubt can lead to negative thinking patterns and limit your ability to achieve success. It can also lead to anxiety and depression, as well as interfering with interpersonal relationships. Self-doubt can impact work performance and productivity. The truth is that self-doubt doesn’t go away. We simply learn how to deal with it better so we can achieve our goals and live our best life. Learn to Embrace Your Self-Doubt It may sound weird, but the first step to deal with your self-doubt is to embrace it. In other words, when you have self-doubt simply acknowledge it. Don’t beat yourself for having doubts about yourself and your abilities. Having self-doubts is normal – we all have them. It’s what makes us real and what makes us humans. So, accept that sometimes you will doubt yourself. Instead of being reactive and trying to run away from it by distracting yourself – embrace it. In so doing, you will not waste your time, energy and motivation trying to avoid it. Embracing your self-doubt allows you to refocus your energy and fully concentrate on your goals. A Key is to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others. "The only person you should try to be better than is who you were yesterday"– Unknown. I understand that it is easier to compare yourself to others but doing so is one of the reasons why we struggle with insecurities. Comparing yourself to others leads to self-doubt…it causes it. So, an effective way to deal with self-doubt is to compare yourself only to YOU. In other words, compare yourself to who you were yesterday to see how far you have come. For instance: suppose you started your Business 4 month ago. Instead of comparing your success to someone who is further ahead of you, compare your success to when you first started. When you assess your progress, don’t forget to celebrate your small wins. As Stefan James says, ‘what gets rewarded, gets repeated’. GAP vs GAIN by Dan Sullivan. Build Your Self-Confidence to Overcome Doubt To build confidence you need to remember, it is important to be accepting of your mistakes and failures, as they are part of the learning process. Also try practicing positive self-talk and daily affirmations can also be helpful. You can make lots of simple choices to build your self-confidence. Just as there are many ways to strengthen your body, there are ways you can increase your resolve by setting small goals, making healthier choices, nurturing your spirit, and finding support. Here are just a few: Break free of self-sabotaging thoughts and behavior patterns. Expand your knowledge, skills, and experiences. Become physically, mentally, and spiritually healthier. Deepen interpersonal relationships. Most of our doubts, lack of confidence and even imposture syndrome comes from negative thinking and thoughts patterns we have established over time. Tips for overcoming negative thinking patterns which cause doubt: Learn to Identify Thought Distortions. Our minds have their clever way of convincing us of something that isn’t actually true. These faulty thoughts reinforce negative thinking. Counter Negative Thoughts with Positive Affirmations. Positive affirmations can be used in a number of different ways. ... Avoid External Negativity. Take steps to avoid things or people in your life that hurt the way you think and feel. Take a Break. One way to separate yourself from negativity is to allow yourself a specified period (no more or less than 10 minutes) with the negative thought. Practice Feeling Grateful. Research shows that feeling grateful has a positive influence on your levels of happiness. Focus on Your Strength. The more you try to focus on your strengths instead of dwelling on mistakes you’ve made in the past, the easier it will be to overcome negative thinking. Seek out Professional Support. If you still have a hard time managing your thoughts and find that they are affecting your ability to meet your daily responsibilities or enjoy. Quote: "Believe in yourself, your abilities and your own potential. Never let self-doubt hold you captive. You are worthy of all that you dream of and hope for" – Roy T Bennett. I Believe that Pushing Yourself to Take Action Despite Your Self-Doubt with Help you Overcome Anything Obstacle in Your Life Quote: "If you hear a voice within you say you cannot paint, then by all means paint and that voice will be silenced" – Vincent Willem Van Gogh. Learn to take action despite your self-doubt and your self-doubt will disappear. When you take action, your doubts and insecurities you actually move towards your goals. Think about it – how many times you had doubts, but you did well anyway? By taking action you reclaim your power and you become in charge of your life. On the other hand, if you don’t take action, you feel anxious and overwhelmed. So, don’t sell yourself short because of your self-doubts. Instead, learn to focus on the present moment, embrace your doubts and ask yourself ‘what small action I can take today to move towards my goals?’. Then, simply take that action. In so doing, you are not engaging in negative self-talk about something, but you are actually doing this thing. And as you act despite your doubts you feel more confident, empowered, motivated and happy. Make sense? Finally, It’s Important You Sharpen your Skills & Mastery of Your Trade Often, when you don’t know how to achieve something the voice of your self-doubt is louder. In other words, the lack of clarity and competence leads to self-doubt, less confidence and inaction. So, having clarity and competence is vital if you want to deal with self-doubt. When you don’t have clarity on what skills you need, simply think of your goal and identify the key steps that you need to take to achieve it. If you struggle to identify what needs to be done research what successful people in that area are doing and follow their steps. Once you know what needs to be done you can make a plan of action to develop your skills. If you need to acquire new skills to achieve your goal, be willing to learn those skills. In other words, have a learning mentality. Read books, watch YouTube videos, listen podcasts and audiobooks, attend seminars or sign up for a course. Whatever it is that you need to learn just take the time to do it. The more you learn, the more competent you become. And with competence comes confidence. When you are confident, you are more likely to take action and make progress regardless of your doubts. Can you see how it all ties together? Look, we all doubt ourselves and that’s okay. It’s what we do next that makes all the difference. I hope these tips will start helping you to identify and overcome your self-doubt each day. Self-doubt is normal, but it doesn’t have to control your life. When you understand that self-doubt is just a negative thought pattern you can take steps to change it.