Rule Breaker Or Rule Follower: Which Are You?

Are you a rule breaker or a rule follower? Are you married to your opposite? We're both rule followers, and when one builds a life with someone who sees the "NO DOGS IN THE LAKE" sign as an invitation to let the golden retriever go for a swim, one is caught between two bad choices: swallow the horrible anxiety that others might think *you* are the sort of person who has zero consideration for clearly posted signage, or be the stick in the mud who can never loosen up a little. In this episode we discuss why both kinds of people exist, and bump up against each other– and why the "no rules pool" isn't as fun as it sounds how rules limit possibilities, good and bad why humans tend to create more rules during and after times of struggle whether kids are born to be rule followers It's worth the struggle to find the balance for our families. In order for our kids to have the secret thrill of breaking a rule, there need to be a few rules there in the first place. Here are links to some of the writing on the topic that we discuss in this episode: Michele Gelfand: Rule Makers, Rule Breakers: How Tight and Loose Cultures Wire Our World jthreenme: Raising a Rule Follower When You're Married To a Rule Breaker Diane Spear: Play By the Relationship Rules! Michele Gelfand for The Guardian: Why countries with 'loose', rule-breaking cultures have been hit harder by Covid Wikipedia: Rumspringa Special thanks to this month's sponsors: Betterhelp Start taking charge of your mental health– no matter where you live! Go to betterhelp.com/fresh to get 10% off your first month of counseling. Membrasin is the totally natural, estrogen-free, clinically proven feminine dryness formula. Go to membrasinlife.com to find out more- and use the code FRESH to get 10% off. Prose is the healthy hair regimen with your name all over it! Get 15% off your first order today! Go to prose.com/laughing . KiwiCo projects make science, technology, engineering, art, and math super fun– and best of all, kids of all ages can work on them independently! Get your first month FREE on select crates at kiwico.com/motherhood. Green Chef’s expert chefs design flavorful recipes that go way beyond the ordinary. Go to greenchef.com/laughing100 and use code laughing100 to get $100 off including free shipping! Happy Dance skin care products are made with premium ingredients, including the highest quality CBD. Get 15% off your first Happy Dance order by going to doahappydance.com/laughing . Helix customized mattresses will give you the best sleep of your life! Get up to $200 off all mattress orders, plus two free pillows, at helixSleep.com/laughing. Design like a pro with Canva Pro ! We use it for all our images– we've upped our game and saved time too. Right now, you can get a FREE 45-day extended trial when you go to canva.me/fresh . The Cozi Family Organizer is for anyone juggling camp schedules, practices, meetings, doctor’s appointments, and maybe a date night once in a while. Download Cozi for free from the app store! Magic Spoon cereal gets protein into your kids’ breakfast- and with 0 grams of sugar. Go to magicspoon.com /FRESH and use the code FRESH at checkout to get $5 off! Jane.com is a boutique marketplace featuring the latest in women’s fashion, accessories, home decor, children’s clothing, and more. You will not believe the prices! Visit jane.com /laughing. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices